I open my eyes a little and look at the digital alarm clock by my bed--4:45. I start to go back to sleep. Then I am suddenly wide awake. Thank God I'm fine. I was in a car accident yesterday and my back is not even stiff.

I stopped at a government building after I left the Shelter to turn in an amendment to a grant request. As I came out of the driveway, I looked right, I looked left and then bump--an incredible noise and jolt. How could this have happened? I am shocked, then angry. My excellent driving record is gone. I was just a tiny bit careless, perhaps. A little too casual. I throw the keys on the floor. Shit! I can't open my door. I crawl across to the passenger side and get out that door. The other car is pulled up to the curb, the left side scraped and indented across two doors. I stand by the door, but the driver doesn't open it or the window. I see he is talking on a cell phone. I move around to the other side and stand on the sidewalk waiting. He is wearing a baseball cap, but as she rolls down the window, I see that it is a woman with very short hair. "What street is this?" she says. "Satula", I say. "Are you calling the police?" "Yes," she says. "Are you all right?" I ask. "Fine," she says. She makes another call. I go back to my car. I call Ray. "I've been in an accident. I think the car is totaled. Can you come here?" "where are you? he says. I stumble, trying to tell him, but eventually he understands. "I don't know if the car is drivable. Maybe you should call home and have Daddy come get you." "Yes," he says. "that's the best thing to do." "And call Sate Farm." "Right."

I hear sirens. The ambulance arrives. I am surprised, but I assume it is routine. The police are right behind. A policewoman asks me to move my car. "I'm not sure I can. I couldn't open the door, so I crawled out the passenger side." She opens the door on the driver's side. It creaks and resists, but opens. I get in and it starts right up and I pull around behind her like she asks. I say, "Why is the ambulance here? She told me she was fine." "She asked for it," she tells me. "Don't worry, everything's okay." she says. "It's normal. she was probably shook up." "Well, yeah." I say with feeling. She was probably terrified.

As I look around, I see a red pickup truck down the street. I take a picture with my cell phone. This is what I think happened. She came around a corner and was hidden by the truck. It's a small black car. She pulled onto the other side of the street to go around him and hand not gotten back over when I started out. A combination of things that led to expensive and aggravating, but fortunately not injurious, consequences.

I give my license and insurance card to the cop and she says, "Wait a minute, just stay in your car. No need to be cold." I call Ray again and tell him the car drives. He calls the body shop back to cancel the tow truck. Eventually the cop gives me back my license and a ticket--failure to yield right of way. She says I can go to court and protest it or I can pay the fine. I feebly say, "the pickup truck..." She says they have to put that on there, it's routine, and I nod. I have heard this before from other people. The car that hits the other car is the one at fault. "You're free to go." I call Ray one more time. "Is Daddy there yet? I can come get you." "No," he says. "Go to Patton Brothers. They're expecting you. I'll meet you there." I start the car again and drive to the body shop. We've been there before, but it's been years. I am sad and a little nervous. Is the car really safe to drive? I imagine people are looking at me--other drivers are saying to themselves, "better give her a wide berth."

At the body shop, they are kind and ask how I am. "A little upset," I say... I wait a few minutes and then Mike comes out with a clipboard. We look at the damage together. It is really not too bad. The bumper has torn up, the way they are designed to do. It looks like the door, the hood and even the headlight are okay. We go back inside and he adds it all up. $2200. Whew, not totaled. My baby--I've had this car almost 8 years, over 150,000 miles and I am glad it can be repaired. Although a tiny part of me was hoping this would mean we could get a new Prius. They get even better mileage. Ray and my Dad arrive. They are sympathetic and give me hugs. Mike gets what he calls a spoon, but looks more like a apatula, and makes it so the door can open and close without rubbing.

Ray drives me home; we stop and get gas. Daddy goes on ahead. I am okay. We will have to pay $250 deductible because I am at fault. And the citation; I don't know how much that is. We go back to the scene. The truck is gone, but I show him how it was and he starts to get mad. "Yeah," he says. "It wasn't your fault at all." It is nice to have a champion, but I don't really think the court would agree, so I probably won't go. We'll see how much it is. I think "thank goodness for insurance." And probably for the way they make cars to protect their occupants.

With my iPhone, I have updated my Facebook status to say I have been in an accident. My older daughter Amelia is on the phone when I walk in the door, talking to my Dad. I talk to her a bit, but have nothing really to say. "I'm fine."

My Mom has been making dinner. It smalls good. And we all have a drink. It is nice to have a family to take care of you in these situations. I just sit and try to calm down, while other people do things around me. My father cannot get over the idea that I would rush to tell everyone via Facebook before I even got home...I guess I just felt the need to connect with people.

So, other than that... my boss was there when I arrived yesterday (a few minutes late). She said she was at 62%. Kerri showed up for the staff meeting, but she didn't feel good either. Brandy had called in sick as well. I felt very vulnerable, like I would probably catch it too. Meredith and I talked about lots of things during the day. I didn't really go into the problems of delivering the grant, but I did mention the fact that I couldn't get onto her computer to find out about mailing it because she changed the password. She said, it was in the Shared Documents file and I said, but that is on your computer. Then she talked about google cloud computing, where everything is stored on line, and she is going to be trying to set that up. I didn't say, maybe that isn't the first thing to worry about... We talked a lot about the Job TREC program and changes that need to be made. Sometimes I think she is a lot like me, but then she says something that reminds me how different we are in age...or yesterday she said something about how she hates when people cry. "Do that in your car," she said. So I will have to try to restrain myself if I feel like crying.

I had lunch with Becky and janna in Five Points--15 minutes there, 15 minutes back, 30 minutes to eat and talk. It's nice to have friends. Of course, I didn't tell them I was going to have a car accident later that day.

After dinner, we played a little cards and watched a little TV and went to bed. I said, "thanks for not yelling at me." Ray said, "I never get mad about big things." Which is true. And that's nice.